In the Dark of the Midway
by EJ Santry
Summary: Edward lives a life of anonymity amidst the Midway of the Carnival. He only steps out into the light to find someone to fill his carnal needs. Follow him through a day in his life.
1. New Castle, KY

**A/N: This was written as a birthday gift to FloridaChickie. I jokingly mentioned this idea for a fic a year ago, and she has waited patiently while I brought it to fruition. Enjoy Carniward!**

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I stepped out of my trailer that was parked under a giant oak tree. Stretching my arms up above my head, I felt my back pop back into alignment. No trailer bed was ever long enough for my six foot frame.

"Dude, let's roll," I yelled banging on the door.

"I'm comin'. I'm comin'," my friend, Jasper, calls as he half stumbles on the step of our trailer. He pushes back his blond hair from his face, and pulls on his cowboy hat. "Let's find some grub."

"There is a Bob Evans booth over there," I pointed. "I think we can talk that sweet thing in there to whipping us up a couple farm boys*."

"Excellent," Jasper said almost drooling.

So, we found ourselves sitting on a painted white picnic table eating our sausage sandwiches, and watching the rest of the fairgrounds come to life. I had been working for JCJ Amusements for three years now. Jasper and I started about the same time. He was looking to travel and I was looking for anonymity. Our friendship was an easy one where questions didn't delve too deep. We split the cost of a used trailer, the truck to pull it, and we were on our way. We sweet talked our way into most of our meals and all of our conquests. About the only thing we did pay for was gas, booze, and condoms.

We finished our breakfast, and walked over to our section, Kiddie rides. You might laugh at our choice, me with my black t-shirt and black baseball hat. The only sleeves I wore were the tattoos that snaked up and down my arms. I hardly advertised "kid friendly". Jasper was all honey sweet southern with his sleeveless button down with the frayed sleeves. So why did we work the kiddie section, instead of the big rides. Because every female that visited our section was almost guaranteed to be consenting adult age and we knew they put out.

I was just looking for a release, going for those that gave off the vibe that they were just looking for an hour or two of a good time before they had to get back to their shitty life. Jasper, on the other hand, was more of a monogamist, if you can call it that. He had a lady for every stop of our summer tour. Same chicks, every summer. He never left them with any promises other than to return the following year. Right now, we were in Kentucky, and that meant Alice. Alice, I liked. She was easy going and fed us enough to last us months. She owned a descent sized horse farm, and was always at the local county fairs with her horses and students. Jasper wouldn't be around much this week. He always stayed with Alice when we were here.

Now me on the other hand, I couldn't be bothered going back to a woman's place, or even walking her the 30 feet to our trailer. Nope, I was more of the in the shadows of the dart game booth up against the wall type. There were plenty of dark corners and loud noises to suit my needs. I didn't want the misunderstanding of this being anything other than what it was, a fuck. There would be no cuddling or talking before or after. There would be no trading phone numbers, not that I even had a phone. There wasn't even names. It was you and I getting off, and moving on. There would be no more commitments for me...ever.

So our day began. My pics usually don't come from the early crowd. Typically teenage baby-sitter for the summer and stay-at-home moms. The first I am not into, and typically the second category is too sweet for me. They actually take the time to look at me, which is always discerning for someone hoping to be looked over. They want to see who it is that is making sure their children are safe. Despite my rough appearance, they always smile at me, as well.

The dinner crowd usually brings those just off of work women. They don't see me at all. Of course, they don't really seem to see their kids either. I sampled a few from that buffet, but they are counting the minutes even faster than I am. I like fucking, not frigidity.

Now, the after hours crowd is just to my liking. Those that come out after the sun begins to set. They are relaxed, and most likely, this is the only chance they can get out and socialize for a bit. Also, they tend to travel in packs, so I can nip one off, and her kids still have someone looking after them.

That is when I spotted her. I nudged Jasper with my elbow and nodded in the direction of tonight's winner. He smiled a knowing smirk at me. She was a skinny thing in cut-off shorts and a tight 1980s U2 Tour shirt. Her hair was obviously dyed black, and her eyes were made up darkly. She walked along with a blond who had a gaggle of kids about her. She was taking a drag off of her cigarette when they came to the Kiddie Cars we were manning. We got the kids loaded on, and just as we were getting ready to start the ride, a big ass piece of a man came up grabbing the blond in the ass.

"Hey, Bells. Can you watch the kids for a sec while Rosie and I ride the Ferris Wheel?" he asked my prospect.

"You are such a toddler, Emmett," she huffed, but then resigned. "Go ahead."

The two ran off like two teenagers, and "Bells" took another drag from her cigarette occasionally waving to the kids as they past by her, with one occasionally screaming "Aunt Bella" in her direction. None of the kids are hers, even better. She would on occasion look my direction, and I would flash her my half smile that I knew was my golden ticket. Bella just shook her head a bit and gave a small huff of a laugh before turning her attention back to the ride. I looked down at my watch and saw that the kids rides were only due to be open for another 30 minutes. Plenty of time for me to seek out this girl, because it looked like they just got here.

I kept track of Bella and her family's progression through the kiddie rides, and saw them amble towards the midway when the kiddie rides began to shut down.

"I got this," Jasper said as we began to close up shop. "Go hunt down your piece of tail."

"Thanks, man," I said and I was off.

I caught up with them over by the games. The big guy was playing the darts game. Two of the kids were asleep in the wagon they had with them and the oldest was cheering on her dad. The blond was making eyes at her husbands display of machismo. Quietly, I walked up behind Bella, who was standing a small distance from her family watching, and for the love of Christ, was sucking on a corn dog.

"You are making every man in a ten foot radius very envious of that corn dog," I whispered quietly. I expected her to jump, but what I didn't expect was her to just smirk around the tip that was grazing her lips.

"Is that a fact?" She said quietly in reply. "They can all purchase one for themselves right there." She said pointing over her right shoulder with said corn dog.

"Let me rephrase, every man is wishing those plump red lips were wrapped around them," I said bluntly.

"Are you including yourself in that crowd of jealous men?"

"No." She looked shocked for a moment, until I continued. "Because in about 15 minutes, I am going to have you begging to put my dick where that corn dog is."

"You seem pretty sure of yourself."

"I just know I am right."

With that, I turned and walked down the midway back towards the darkened Kiddie ride section. I pulled my pack of cigarettes from my pocket sliding one between my lips before casting my face in a yellow glow from my lighter. I made my way back over to the cars, and pulled out one of our folding chairs, and had a seat, propping my feet onto the fence. Soon, I saw a silhouetted figure walking towards me with the red tip of a cigarette as the only color on the figure.

"You came," I grinned.

"Not yet," was her reply.

I stubbed out my cigarette, and took her hand. Lifting her up over the fence, I hopped over behind her and led her to the darkened side of the ride. I lifted her up to stand on the metal platform and it made us almost eye level. I reached forward then, and undid the button on her shorts.

"Why this ride?" She asked as my hand slid down her stomach and through her slick folds. Jesus, she's a waxer.

"One," I said nibbling her neck while my fingers began to slide and retract slowly. "There is some privacy and space between the cars."

"Two," I continued as I plunged as many fingers into her and she whimpered. "There are a lot of handles to grab onto depending on how we do this."

"Finally," I said as my thumb raced back and forth across her clit while my fingers curled, "this bitch doesn't squeak one bit, so I can pound into you, and only if you cry out will people know any better."

With that, she shuddered and her mouth fell open in a silent cry. As she leaned over and grasped hold of one of the backs of the motorcycles so her knees wouldn't buckle. I took that moment to pull a condom from by back pocket and undo my pants.

"How do you want to do this?" I asked her. She tilted her ass towards me, and looked at me over her shoulder.

"I want to see how deep you can go just like this," she said.

As I ripped open the condom, pulled myself free of my pants, she had her shorts and panties around her ankles. I took a step forward putting one hand on her hip and the other on my dick before burying myself in her. I had to bite my lip from crying out, and it sounded like she was doing the same.

"I hope you're holding on," I said before I pulled out and slammed back into her again and again. She felt really good. She was no virgin, but her shit wasn't loose either. She quietly took everything I was giving her with the occasional exhale of pleasure escaping her lips, or a quiet "yes". Just as I felt my balls tightening, I felt her body clamp down on mine before throbbing around me and bringing me to my release.

I fell forward, with my arms caging her as I sought stability on the fake motorcycles' seats.

"Jesus, that was fantastic," she muttered. I quietly laughed and kissed her shoulder before I could stop myself. I had to get out of here. I pulled out, and disposed the condom in the trash can that was just over the fencing. By the time I turned back around, and was buttoning myself up, I saw that she was already completely redressed, and lighting a new cigarette.

"So, thanks for that," she said giving me a little smile. I walked over and lifted her up, placing her on the other side of the fence, my hand lingering on her arm. She looked down at it in question, before pulling away. She gave me one last smile, and walked away.

As I watched her go, for the first time in a long time, I wished someone had asked for my number.


	2. Burning Dreams

**A/N: Thanks to einfach_mich for the pictspiration.**

Two years earlier...

I lean back in the Adirondack chair I am perched on in the backyard with a half-empty glass in one hand and a bottle of whiskey next to me in the grass. Somewhere in the distance I can hear the sirens. The heat from the fire blazing in front of me reaches my face and it is the first bit of warmth that has touched me in years. I watch in amazement as my shiny black baby grand is consumed by fire. The flames seem to be engulfing the inside, the lid, and the legs, but I watch as the keys seem to remain untouched by the fiery fingers of the blaze. It is almost as if the fire itself is mocking me. I can't touch the keys, so neither will it. My face is beginning to prickle from the heat, but I remain stoic and unblinking...empty.

I start thinking back to the day that I came home to find it sitting in our living room. I had an old upright for years, but I thought that her buying the grand for me meant she was ready to begin the next phase of our lives. That my dreams were finally going to get their day in the sun. I laugh humorlessly to myself, drain my glass, and chuck it into the fire.

We had met as undergrads. She was studying poly sci and I was double majoring in engineering and music. My parents agreed that I should pursue my passion, but balance it with practicality. It made for a heavy work load, but the music side of things didn't feel like work at all. I loved it. We had met in a general curriculum astronomy class that we were both taking to fulfill a requirement. I asked her out on our first date halfway through the semester, and that was it for me. For her too, so I thought.

We married shortly after receiving our degrees. She was diving into law school and I went to work for a government contracted company as an electrical engineer. I was going to work while she finished her degree, and then we would try to start a family. I agreed to stop working because the idea of being a stay-at-home dad really appealed to me. Also, being at home would give me time to play with composing. This was our plan. This is what made the agonizing years as an engineer worth it to me. These images of softly playing through an idea while a baby slept in a swing next to my piano, and a toddler played happily on the floor.

As she entered her second year of law school, my superiors encouraged me to get my MBA. They even offered to help pay for it. She encouraged me to pursue it at night. She told me even if I didn't end up using it, it would still be an accomplishment to have. And so, I received my MBA just around the time she was finishing up law school. I enjoyed those years, actually. The nights we both would be sitting at the dining room table with laptops, books, and papers scattered around us. Or the nights we would curl up in front of the fire of our town home each reading something and taking notes for class. Yet always in the back of my mind, as she lay with her head on my lap and book in hand, my mind would imagine not the flat stomach that peaked out from under shirt, but a belly swollen with our child.

Finally, graduation came and went for both of us, and the excuses began. There always seemed to be an excuse. At first, it was that she wanted to get at least a year under her belt before needing to take any leave for a pregnancy. I agreed with her logic. She had just finished school. So, I continued on with my engineering job, being promoted to management with the help of my degree. With both of us working, money was suddenly in abundance, so we decided to buy our house. I liked the homes that were more secluded. That had a bit more yard for the kids we would eventually have. She insisted on a fancy house in a fancy neighborhood. We were modern day yuppies, and she loved it. Nice house with a manicured yard and the fancy sports car in the driveway to boot. She glowed in her tailored suits and designer heels. My closet began to fill with suits with Armani tags, and I sighed missing the days when I wore polos and khakis to work.

We attended galas and fundraisers. She gave to charities in cash, but never in service. After one particular event, five years after her graduation, for a children's hospital, I told her I was ready to have children of our own. She smiled and said we could start trying, and I scooped her up in my arms and raced her to our room. We made passionate love that night and I remember the smile still frozen on my face as I drifted to sleep with my hand over her stomach. Yet it didn't happen that night. Nor the next few months. She kept telling me to be patient, and I started wondering if we should be tested. After a year of trying, I went to see my doctor, and then to a specialist. I came back with a report of everything in order. She refused to go to the doctor stating she didn't have time right now because of the case she was working on.

So we continued. Her thriving in her life, and me sinking into hopelessness. She didn't even seem to notice.

One day, I came home with a raging headache. The stress of the situation was becoming too much, and this job that I had now been in for over a decade was wearing me thin. I hated the work. I had done it, because it provided well for us, but I hated it now. I opened my medicine cabinet in search of my bottle of Advil to find it empty. I walked over to hers then, pushing around the rows of nail polish and creams looking for any type of asprin. It was when I moved a row of lotions aside that I saw it. A packet of birth control pills. I froze wondering why she kept it all this time. Reaching in, I looked down at the rows of pills, and then at the embossed expiration date on the package. 2014? How long do these things last? Curious, I walked over and fired up my laptop. Soon I was Googling the life span of a birth control pill. Four years. These were new. My heart sank as I realized that I had been lied to for the last three years.

When she got home that night, I had the dining room set for dinner with candlelight. I had made her favorite dinner. When she asked what was the occasion, I slid the birth control packet slowly over to her, not saying a word.

"What the hell, Edward? Why were you snooping through my stuff?"

"I was looking for asprin, not deception," I said softly, and my next words barely made it through the hurt that was constricting my throat. "Why did you lie to me?"

"I just wasn't ready at first, but over time I've realized that I will _never _be ready. I don't want kids. I like our life how it is. Don't you?"

"No. I don't. I'm miserable! I have been killing myself, because we were working towards a life. A life that included children. I _want _that life, not this one." I put my head down into my hands.

"Well, I don't."

"What are you saying?"

"I'm saying that we don't want the same things anymore. We are not the same people."

"I'm still the God damn same!" I yelled, slamming my fist down on the table. "I've never lied about what I wanted."

Her voice was dead calm. "Then maybe it is time we said goodbye."

Icy panic set into the pit of my stomach. "Let's not be rash. Maybe with some more time..."

"No, Edward. Time is not going to change my mind. I know a couple lawyers. I'll give you their numbers."

With that she cleared her dishes and went to bed.

The next few weeks were a blur. She moved out. I was served with papers. I didn't fight her on anything. She decided to split the assets 50/50, and I didn't object. To object would mean that I felt something. I felt nothing. With there being no fight, and no...children, she was able to expedite things through her connections.

So that is where I found myself this evening. Sitting in a house full of mostly empty rooms and boxes of my things. The "SOLD" sign had just been placed on our front lawn two days ago. I walked into the room that housed my piano. It was surrounded by windows, including a set of french doors that lead out to the backyard. The only illumination was from the full moon that floated in the sky. I had come home three hours ago, and commenced drinking my dinner. I was halfway through the Johnny Walker watching my previously happy images of my future blow away like wisps of clouds that I set the bottle down on the lid of the piano, and walked over throwing the french doors open wide.

That was about an hour ago. An hour ago that unlocked the wheels on my grand, rolled her out into the yard, gave her a good drink of my JW Black, and lit the fucker. I pulled up a chair and watched as my dreams went up in flames. My happiness burning to the ground.


End file.
